Last week my sweet Siobhan bared her soul, telling you guys about the dirty products still in her medicine cabinet—and then she signed me up to do the same! It’s funny: some of you seemed surprised by her honesty but I’m not sure why: We’ve always maintained that women shouldn’t sacrifice their absolute favorite products, especially if you don’t use them daily, and most especially if they bring you pleasure. Because pleasure is a big principle here, in No More Dirty Looks land.
But here’s the thing about my list: Other than waterproof mascara (Laura Mercier), which I’ve mentioned in the past, and my new sorta-natural highlights (update: I love them SO much, and my hair is getting dirtier by the day!) my cabinet is clean. It’s not out of any obligation though: I did have this amazing Bobbi Brown concealer a little while back, but once I discovered the Jane Iredale Active Light one I forgot about it.
But not one to leave my friend alone in her confessions—and besides, we’ve got a nice circle of trust going here—I’m going to reveal some other dirty secrets of my own.
For us, health and beauty are synonymous. And we all do things that we shouldn’t if we want to look our best. Maybe you skimp on sleep, suck back martinis, work on the weekends, or binge on sugar. So let’s have at it, shall we? And just to prove that no vice is too vicey, I’m going to come forward with my absolute worst:
1. I think I’ve made it pretty clear that sometimes I drink too much. This generally wreaks havoc on my face in the form of pimples and/or some patchy redness. But here’s the real doozy, and I can’t even believe I’m copping to this, but in the name of transparency, here it is: Sometimes when I’m tipsy I’ll have (ahhhhh, the shame, the shame) a cigarette. As vices go, it doesn’t get much worse for your health or your skin. The irony isn’t lost on me, of course, and the sheer guilt of it is probably doing some damage too. How often does it happen? I’m not great with consistency, but it’s only been about a month since my last slip.
2. I often forget to take my omegas. Sounds like nothing after my first admission, I know—but seriously, omegas are the truth.
3. I probably drink too much caffeine, but since it’s not keeping me up at night, literally or figuratively, I’m going to let this one slide for now.
OK, you’re up. I implore you not to leave me out here in the cold.
You guys, something pretty major happened last week. Yes, Osama’s dead, relations with Pakistan are fraught, and Michelle Obama’s dougie almost outshone her husband’s own stellar moves (in case you missed him on 60 Minutes)—but also, I got highlights. Don’t be mad!
Here’s what happened: Remember how a few weeks ago I was musing about a spring makeover? Well, that longing for a physical change grabbed me by the girly bits in a way that became distracting—nay, completely consuming!—and it just wouldn’t let go.
And the more pictures I saw like the one above—of beautiful women with gorgeous and golden-tipped locks (now known as “ombre” highlights)—the more convinced I became.
Here’s how I justified it: 1. I would find a natural-as-possible salon to do it at. 2. I would only do my ends, so the dye would never touch my scalp. 3. If I didn’t like it, or it looked too fake for my dark hair, I’d just give my mane a much-needed chop.
So I headed down to NaturalMind, a cleaner salon in Silver Lake that I’d heard great things about. And to my total delight the founder, Arnaud, who arrived on the L.A. hair scene by way of 20-years-at-a-fancy-salon-in-Paris knew exactly what to do with me. He touched my coarse curls and told me he would never use foils on them—never! And in a thicker-than-butter French accent, he said: “You came to ze right place. I‘ve been doing zis balayage technique in Paris forrrever. We make it a little bit surfer, yeah?”
Mmhmm. That’s exactly how we make it, Arnaud—like I spent a week on the beaches of St. Tropez, s’il vous plait. And with an artist’s skill—and an almost-odorless-and-heavy-on-the-natural-oils dye—he painted my highlights with the subtlety of the sun itself. And I love it!
But here’s where my story goes a bit south. My new favorite hairdresser also convinced me to wash my hair. Granted, with an ostensibly natural shampoo (I say that because even with the best intentions, one can never be sure at the salon), but a shampoo nonetheless. It felt like heaven and it smelled like lavender but…
Until last week, shampoo hadn’t touched my hair in two and a half years.
And there’s a reason for that. Not washing it, I realize now with even greater clarity, had given my hair something it never had: predictability. It also eliminated my need for product—aside from a tiny bit of conditioner and some Intelligent Nutrients spray for special occasions.
But now that it’s clean I’m back in the maintenance game. It’s not a total horror show or anything—it’s just really fluffy, puffy and frizzy. Mostly, it needs product. And the ends look dry. And the curl doesn’t hold in the same way. And, and, and—I just miss those natural oils I’d worked so hard to harness!
But, like a big girl, I’m not going to cry over my clean hair. I’m going to throw on my favorite natural products, follow Siobhan’s summer hair advice, and let time and my scalp do their thing. In a way, the wash is as much of a “new look” as the color—so there’s that. Maybe it will even become an annual spring-cleaning tradition of sorts. Or not.
Got any salon disasters or success stories to share? You know the drill, ladies.
Have any of you heard the rumor—or perhaps conspiracy theory is more accurate—that Jackie O’s lymphoma was a consequence of her frequent hair dyeing? We don’t subscribe to such fear mongering, but it is true that dark hair dyes are notoriously toxic.
Siobhan—brave soul—experimented with natural blonde highlights in the book. But as the resident brunette I never tested out any of the clean dyes, or DIYs (like the coffee rinse) for darker hair. I’ll admit that it was a an oversight. See, I just haven’t colored my hair since my tween experiments with henna—and there were so many other things to try! But no more excuses. I know it’s a major concern for some of you, and it appears it may be for me too soon: The grays are creeping on me! Yep, they’re sprouting from the top of my head like little electrocuted worms.
So I’m calling on you ladies for counsel. Have any of you tried the darker natural dyes? The coffee? Has anything been a success or a failure? I plan to do some heavy googling about this, but your stories would be appreciated.
We’re the first to admit that it’s hard to bid farewell to some products. That’s not to say we don’t stand by our promise: Truly clean cosmetics offer better results than the chemical crap. Hands down. But there are certain items you’re just not going to find in the naturals category…
Like the waterproof mascara that leaves nary a smudge after a night on the town. Or the antiperspirant that actually stops you from sweating—which is generally a terrible idea, but incredibly appealing on a hot summer’s day or, you know, a date. Natural hair dye? It works for some women, but we can’t recommend it in good conscience—just read in the book about Siobhan’s unfortunate turn with natural highlights. How about a bewitching scent that lasts all day? Not likely, since you can thank hormone disrupting phthalates for that lasting power, and those are verboten in a real clean product. Nail polish does offer some better options, but nothing we’d put on our kids (if we had any).
So what’s a girl to do? Well, we subscribe to the 80-20 rule. That means some nights we whip out the waterproof mascara, or that old Degree stick we never brought ourselves to throw out. Not every day, or even every week, but certainly when the occasion calls for it.
Now you: What decidedly unnatural product or treatment could you never let go of? (And get ready, because next week’s challenge may involve one…)
We bet you do. A whopping 70 percent of us bottle our blondes, reds and chestnuts, and it’s not hard to understand why. But here’s something: Hair dye is pretty toxic. Even conservative experts say as much (never a good sign) and it’s also bad for your hair. And yet I love me some highlights. So what to do?
As with all things, we think it’s important to be informed, and then calculate the risks. If you do the math and you still want to dye your hair, then for the love of god, eat your broccoli.
A few things worth noting:
—Hair dye has been linked to lymphoma in hair stylists, whose rates of exposure are much higher than the average four-times-a-year highlighter.
—Many chemicals in dyes are irritants, some are suspected carcinogens and others still are immune system toxicants.
—Dark dyes are more toxic than blondes.
—Europe has banned a boatload of chemicals used in hair dyes that we still use on this side of the pond.
—You want to avoid dyes containing p-phenylenediamine, diaminobenzene, ammonia and peroxide (goodluckwiththat), and that means if you’re going to a salon, you’re going to be the girl who asks to see ingredient labels. Awkward, but advised.
—Have you met Miranda Priestly? Or Helen Mirren, for that matter? Gray hair on ladies is sexy!
Those of you who have the book may already know I’m an on-again-off-again highlighter (who had a horrific experience when I tried to go “natural” with my dye job), but in the past year, something weird happened. Sort of by accident, I stopped coloring my hair. It’s been more than eight months since I’ve touched it, and I’m kind of digging how it looks. The base seems to match my skin tone better—Stacy Malkan told me she had the same thought when she stopped coloring hers—and it’s healthier, obviously.
But we’re not zealots about such things. So we want to know—do you dye yours? How often? Do you worry about the chemicals involved?
