Dear Maybelline, What Goes Into a 14 Hour Lipstick?
Have you guys seen these ads for Maybelline’s new Super Stay 14Lipstick?
The other night, after a week-long vacation from television, I went on a bit of a marathon, and I must have seen this thing 10 times. It’s good. Catchy jingle. Pretty girls. Bright pop-colored mouths. For a moment I was like: OMG 14 hour lipstick! What a great idea!
Just kidding. But I definitely saw the appeal. So around time four, I lazily reached for the old laptop and did a quick search. I had to know what sorts of weird chemicals it could possibly take to keep something on your mouth—where you will inevitably ingest at least some of what you put on there—for 14 hours. We’re talking all the way from breakfast to post-dinner drinks, folks. And thanks to Ulta, Sephora’s ugly cousin, the list was right there.
I am posting this with one goal, and one goal only. To make you (and Siobhan) laugh as much as I did when I saw this. Here are the ingredients:
Trimethylsiloxyphenyl Dimethicone, Isododecane, Polypropylsilsesquioxane, Cyclopentasiloxane, Polyethylene, Stearyl Heptanoate, Ozokerite, Hydrogenated Styrene/Methyl Styrene/Indene Copolymer, C30-45 Alkyldimethylsilyl Polypropylsilsesquioxane, Silica Dimethyl Silylate, Alumina, Parfum / Fragrance, Cyclomethicone, Calcium Aluminum Borosilicate, Synthetic Fluorphlogopite, Calcium Sodium Borosilicate, Benzyl Alcohol, Silica, Pentaerythrityl Tetra-Di-T-Butyl Hydroxyhydrocinnamate, Polyethylene Terephthalate, Tin Oxide, Aluminum Hydroxide, Acrylates Copolymer, Paraffin, Dimethicone. May Contain: Mica, CI 77891 / Titanium Dioxide, CI 77491, CI 77492, CI 77499 / Iron Oxides, CI 15850 / Red 7, CI 45410 / Red 28 Lake, CI 45380 / Red 22 Lake, CI 15985 / Yellow 6 Lake, CI 19140 / Yellow 5 Lake, CI 42090 / Blue 1 Lake, CI 75470 / Carmine.
I mean? #*%*$#@!! I don’t even know what to say, because I don’t have the slightest clue what most of these ingredients are. (And we’ve spent, oh several years, researching this stuff.) For a large part, neither does Skin Deep—not a good sign. Note: If an ingredient gets a zero on their site, and is only listed in like 3 products, that doesn’t mean it’s safe: It likely means there’s just no information available on it.
Anyways, just wanted to share. According to the shoppers on Ulta who reviewed it, the whole 14 hours thing is pretty much a hoax (though it does have some lasting power—I mean, I should hope so!). And despite the bold claim of “No dragging. No drying. No letdowns at all.” several women wrote that the product indeed dried the dickens out of their lips, one woman writing: “This product has a great line of colors that look just as good on, but it severely dried my lips… like, painfully chapped. I do not think the color is worth the pain.”
Now let’s have some fun: What’s the dumbest product you’ve ever bought based on a ridiculous promise? I can remember this one very expensive stretch mark cream—stretch mark cream always equals lie—that also claimed was “discovered” (by happenstance!) to be the most effective wrinkle cream on the market. Remember the name? You’ll win a special place in my heart if you post it in the comments.
Image via Maybelline’s site